The Death of the Little Yellow Race Car

Let's have a moment of silence for the little yellow race car.

Yes, I'm afraid it's true. Henry's most beloved toy - which also makes it one of my proudest yard-sale treasures ever - has been laid to rest. You want the scoop? It's a tale of dirty little secrets that I am going to confess to you today. I'm ready to blow this story out of the water.

Last Thursday afternoon, I got Henry up from his nap, changed a massive dirty diaper, and fed him a snack. A completely innocuous and entirely routine chain of events. Or so I thought.

We'd been fighting a case of diaper rash that was threatening to get really nasty. Protocol is a temporary change in diet, lots of diaper cream, and plenty of time roaming around the house sans diaper. A naked hiney is a happy hiney. So, after his snack, I removed his diaper. It was standard operation.

We played for a few minutes in the playroom when the dryer buzzer blared, alerting me to change loads. I picked Henry up to come with me but he protested - LOUDLY - wanting to stay to play with his toys. I decided to let him stay for the five minutes it would take me to switch loads and fold clothes. I was aware of the risk that he might have a potty accident, but tee-tee is pretty easy to clean up, and he had just had a major poopy diaper not long before. The risk that there was even enough poop in him at that point to make any kind of mess seemed minimal.

That is where I was wrong.

I returned as quickly as possible - I estimate four and half or five minutes. That was all the time it took. Upon entering the room, I saw a poop trail four feet in length, clumps and streaks, leading to under our computer desk. I found him there under the desk, covered in poop, with a poop-smeared toy in each hand. The look on his face was bewilderment. I could see the thought-bubble above his head: "Mama - this chocolate icing tastes funny." *gag*

I flew over and picked him up, first trying to hold him out from me but quickly realizing it was of no use. It was already all over me, and he was now reaching and grabbing ahold of my hair and shirt. *gag* I carried him through the house to the bathroom laughing out loud because, well - what else could I do??

I deposited him in the bathtub, running the shower first to hose the poop off of him, then drawing a bath. We scrubbed in shallow water for a few minutes, drained then ran another bath for an extra rinse. When I had him dried and DIAPERED again, I headed for the playroom to assess the damage once again. I was feeling frantic because it was now almost time when I would expect Zac home, and I was now behind in getting supper ready. We had a church event that evening, and I was feeling stressed to get it all done in time.

I made it as far as the kitchen when I heard him. Zac had come home a little early, and was in the playroom. I stopped dead in my tracks. He said, "I see what happened." I told him I was in the process of cleaning up and that he could tend to Henry or he could clean up the playroom. I was 100% sure he'd come get Henry but to my surprise and delight, he opted to clean the playroom. What a prince!!! I got supper going and found my nerves again.

So, that's the poop story.

Wait - what about the little yellow race car, you ask?

Well, you remember that I said he had a poop-smeared toy in each hand? One of them was the little yellow race car. It was in baaaaaad shape. I began the tedious job of cleaning it after we returned from church that night. I worked on it for about twenty minutes before I decided it was a lost cause. There was poop in the wheel wells. Henry had taken it "muddin" in the trail of poop. When I announced I was going to throw it away, Zac came to take a look at it and attempted to take it completely apart. We couldn't get behind the wheels no matter how we tried. Maybe immersing in hot water, but then it likely wouldn't work after that anyway. We sadly bid it farewell. Henry lay sleeping in his bed, none the wiser. I hated the idea of his favorite toy being gone forever.

Well, that's how the end of the little yellow race car came about.

What - you want a happy ending?? Okay, I think I may have one for you:

I had gone to bed early that night, and when Zac finally turned in, he told me that he had searched and found another race car online, ordered it, and even paid the extra few dollars for expedited shipping! See, didn't I tell you? He's a PRINCE!!! Daddy saved the day! You'll notice it isn't exactly the same, but the original had been a yard sale find and probably a few years old.

This is the closest we could find. It arrived today, and the smile on Henry's face when Daddy opened the box was as big as Texas. He carried it around the house, putting it on things like couches, bookshelves, and chairs just like he used to. It made our hearts swell. That kid sure is something special - poop and all.